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Archive for the ‘Family stories’ Category

Remembering My Grandmothers: A Hanukkah Reflection

This Hanukkah I find myself remembering 2 of my grandmothers. One of them I never met but I heard stories from my mother. The other one I stayed with some during the holidays. She was my dad’s mother.

My dad’s mother was known as Grandma Downing. She was born in 1923. She had my dad in 1944. He was born about 1 year before World War 2 ended. I was around 8 or 9 in the early to mid 1990’s. I remember that I was staying with her for Christmas. The tree had been set up in the living room in front of the window. The curtains had been pulled back so that the lights from the tree could be seen from outside. Grandma Downing had been cooking most of the day getting ready for the family to come over for Christmas Dinner. I was in the living room trying to stay out of the way. Grandma Downing was a bit grouchy. She was not the picture of the loving grandma that baked cookies with grandchildren. She generally speaking forbid everyone from coming into the kitchen. I was very surprised when she called be to come to her, because she was standing in near the special Dining room table. She lived in a double wide mobile home. The Dining room was at the other end of the living room without a wall dividing it. However, I knew enough to stay out of that area. So, for her to be calling me to that area was a surprise. I quickly went to her. In her hand was a strange looking electric light. It had a series of candles all connected by a 9-stick candle holder. The middle one was taller than the rest. She then in hushed whispers gave me instructions on where to put it and how to turn it on. As I was putting it where she had instructed curiosity got the better of me. I was to put it behind the curtain but to the side of the tree. So, I asked why because no one from the inside could see it. She answered it is supposed to be seen from the outside. After I finished setting it up, I went outside to see the light. I quickly noticed that you could not see the light from outside either. There was a bench sitting right in front of it. For some reason my grandma had followed me outside, so I mentioned to my Grandma Downing that you could not see it from outside either. She grumbled something about that being for protection and quickly went back inside to the kitchen. I knew enough to leave it along. Later that night just before I went to bed, she had me turning off the light. The next night she again instructed me on how to turn on the light. I remember that every night the lights increased by 1.

Years later I learned about Hanukkah. I looked at the different The Hanukkah menorahs. I saw the different styles. I was surprised to recognize one of them. It was just like my Grandma Downing’s light from so long ago. Around the same time, I was researching the family history and learned that 5 generations back from my Grandma Downing, her great-grandfather had changed their last name before moving from Alabama to Mississippi. I can’t help but wondering if they were hiding the fact that they were Jewish.

I told my mother what I had found. I showed her the picture of the Hanukkah menorah that looked like Grandma Downing’s light. She then explained that her grandmother had the same light that she put in the window every year at Christmas time in a similar way. The only difference was that her grandmother did not hide the light, but she still would not explain the light when asked about the odd way of turning it on. According to my mother she would only say it is tradition.

As I am lighting the candles of my Hanukkah menorah I remember both grandmothers. I am happy that I can share the meaning of the candles with my children. I can put it in front of the window where it can be seen from the inside and the outside.

Car Trouble and the Good Samaritan

Many years ago, there was a single mother who had a daughter who was about 6 years old. They lived in a small community. This was a very religious community.

One day the mother and daughter went to the next town over to buy some things that were needed for the month. On the way back home, the tire on their car went flat. The mother pulled over to the side of the road. They got out the jack and lug wrench. They tried to get the lug nuts off, but to no avail. They hoped that someone would stop and help them. At this time cellphones were not readily available and there was no Triple A to call. Soon a car slowed down. It was a local preacher. The preacher waved and went on his way. A short time later another car slowed down. It was a deacon of a local church. He likewise waved and went on his way. A little while later a truck was heard coming down the road. The truck passed on by, but in just a minute it was seen coming back. The man driving the truck slammed on the brakes. The truck skidded to a stop. Out jumps the town drunk. He mumbles something and gets to work changing the tire while drinking his bud wiser (a common brand of beer). The man then got back in his truck and left. The Mother and daughter got in the car and went home.

Which one of the following is a good neighbor? Jesus told a similar parable and then asked a similar question. Here is the parable that Jesus told:

 And Jesus answering said, A certain man went down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell among thieves, which stripped him of his raiment, and wounded him, and departed, leaving him half dead. And by chance there came down a certain priest that way: and when he saw him, he passed by on the other side. And likewise a Levite, when he was at the place, came and looked on him, and passed by on the other side. But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was: and when he saw him, he had compassion on him, And went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him. And on the morrow when he departed, he took out two pence, and gave them to the host, and said unto him, Take care of him; and whatsoever thou spendest more, when I come again, I will repay thee. Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbour unto him that fell among the thieves? And he said, He that shewed mercy on him. Then said Jesus unto him, Go, and do thou likewise.

The story about the mother and the girl is true. It occurs to me that the preacher was like the priest. The Deacon was like the Levite. The town drunk was like the Samaritan. It should not be that all these years later that the religious leaders are still not understanding what Jesus said about loving thy neighbor.

The Impossible Dream

Many years ago, I had a dream after praying and asking Jesus what I should major in at college. I dreamed that Jesus came to my room and sit on my bed. He came telling me what he wanted me to do. In the dream after Jesus sat down on the bed, I sat up to listen to what he had to say. He told me that I was to teach his children how to read. I asked where I was to teach His children. He said in the public, private, and in the church. After that the dream ended.

The next day, I went to register for college. My initial plan was to pursue computer science, but after that dream, I chose elementary education instead. I’ve taught in both public and private schools, as well as Sunday school. Now, I feel led by Jesus to share Bible studies here and create lesson plans to support homeschooling parents in teaching their children.

It seems impossible to think that Jesus came to me in a dream telling me to teach His children. However, I know what I dreamed. The Dream just as rule to me today as it was all those years ago.

The Life Story of My Dad

When my dad was born on March 16, 1944, in Louisville, Mississippi, his father, Harold, was 27 and his mother, Kathleen, was 20. In 1944, Louisville, Mississippi, USA was a small town with a population of around 3,000 people. The town was predominantly rural, with agriculture being the main industry. The town had limited access to modern amenities, with most households lacking indoor plumbing and electricity. My dad already had one brother, James who was about 3 years older.

When he was 3 months old, his mother went to work in the fields. She left him by the side of the road on a blanket. The road ran beside the field. Later that afternoon, he was found still on the blanket by his grandmother. It had been hot that day and he was dehydrated and badly sunburnt. His grandmother picked him up and went to find her daughter. She then explained that she was taking both my dad and his brother, James, home with her. So, my dad grew up living with his grandparents. His grandfather, Mr. Hartness, was a preacher.

Later his mom and dad had three more children.

My dad lived with them, his grandparents, until they both passed away. Mr. Hartness passed in 1954 with his wife following in 1959. At this time my dad was only 15 years old. The child welfare office sent someone to pick my dad up from his grandparents’ house soon after his grandmother passed. He hid. He hid out for about 1 year. He went every day to his friend’s house to get a plate of food. At the end of that week, he had gotten in touch with his uncles in Georgia. Up until this time, he had made money to live on by running boot leg for his uncles who lived close by in Louisville, MS. After getting in touch with his uncles who lived in Georgia, he went to live with them until he turned 18. There they taught him to drive an eighteen-wheeler, work on cars, trucks, and other equipment, smoke, and drink.

In 1962, my dad’s father passed away.

After coming back from Georgia, he got a job building bridges. He fell off of the Lumberton Bridge on Hwy 55 while working and broke his back. He was put in the St. Dominic’s Hospital in Jackson, MS. His draft notice for the Vietnam War came while he was in the hospital. His mother brought it to him. My dad asked the doctor what to do. The doctor simple said, “give me the notice and I will fill out the necessary forms to explain that you are not going anywhere with that bad back”.

A couple of years later he got married to Diane in 1965, when he was 20 years old. They had three boys. In September of 1982, they filed for divorce. They were divorced on January 19, 1983, after 18 years of marriage. My dad was 38 years old. The boys mostly stay with their mother.

My dad married Karen, my mom, in Jackson, Mississippi, on January 28, 1983, when he was 38 years old and she was 21 years old.

They had an interesting marriage. There were some good times and there were some bad times. They had me about two years later. After I was born, my dad had a hard time finding a job. His back still gave him problems, and he had very little education. My mom was trying to teach him to read. With little hope to of finding a better job, he took a job as a long-haul truck driver. This job was the beginning of the end of their marriage. It was long after taking this job that he decided that it would be better from my mom and me if he divorced her. The local people in the town where we lived looked down on truck drivers. They even said that it was not possible for a truck driver to be saved. (This is not true. Truck Driving is not a sin.) My parents were divorced in September 1989, in Ellisville, Mississippi, after 6 years of marriage. My dad was 45 years old.

In Oct of 1989, my dad was in a bad accident. A car ran under the flatbed trailer he was hauling. This broke his neck. With nowhere else to go, he came home and slept on the couch. He kept me while my mom went to work at the hospital.

In Dec 1989 there was an ice storm. Everything froze. We had horses. While trying to get water for the horses, my mom fell down. She hit her head. There was blood pouring for the gash in her head. Worse yet her back was broken. My dad blew the engine in the car getting her to the hospital. Because, we did not have health insurance, they waited too long to do the surgery on my mom’s back. She was in the hospital till April of the next year.

Things are bad. My dad can’t work because of his neck and me. My mom can’t work because she is in the hospital. My dad thinks that he can’t pray to God, so he tells my mom to pray. Somehow, we get the money needed every month.

In April of 1990, my mom comes home from the hospital. My dad is released to go back to work. He starts back paying child support of $175. That is helpful, but not enough to pay the bills. My mom can’t walk. Her left leg is paralyzed, because the doctors waited too long to do the surgery. It takes her another year to get on her disability.

My dad continues driving, but now he refuses to haul anything but the box containers. In takes about a year for the insurance to pay him his compensation for the accident. When he gets the money, he buys some land in Ovett, MS. He tells my mom that the land will be mine because she let him move back in when he broke his neck.

One night my mom wakes up. She has a bad feeling about my dad. She thinks that he is in trouble, so she starts praying. A little while later he calls. He almost had another accident. The straps broke that was holding the load. The load shifted. He was going down a mountain. According to him, an angel came and kept the truck from falling down the mountain. He wanted to know two things. 1. Where is Janie, the angel looked like her with her hair. 2. Were you praying? The answers were 1. I, Janie, was in my bed asleep. 2. Yes, I was praying. He said thank you.

My dad still misses his grandfather. He sometimes says that if he could only hear his grandfather preach just 1 more time.

My dad loses his son, William Ambers in July of 2000, William is only 27 years old.

In 2002 he marries Shelly. They have 1 child together. They divorce in 2009.

His mother Kathleen passes away in December of 2014, in Jackson, Mississippi, at the age of 91.

He starts asking questions about the Bible. I try to answer the questions. The main question that he keeps asking I am not able to answer. So, start on a quest to find the answer.

Jan. 2019 my dad calls me from the emergency room. Within the week we find out that he has stage 4 lung cancer. He must give up truck driving. He now starts going to church. He asks me to get him some Bibles because he wants to hand them out. I order 10 Bibles. He gives all of the Bibles away. The Sunday before he passes, he asks the preacher, of the church that he has been going to, to come and pray with him. He gives his heart to Jesus. He passed away in May of 2019, in Ovett, Mississippi, when he was 75 years old.

I am thankful that I will see him again in heaven. I still miss him so much.

Exploring Family Stories of Faith and Life Lessons

Family Stories

This collection of family stories explores various themes such as faith, relationships, and personal experiences. It includes narratives about a boat ride, church services, and childhood perspectives emphasizing the importance of listening to the Holy Spirit and learning from diverse life experiences, such as those of a long-haul truck driver.

  • People are People: Child learns from truck-driving father that all people, regardless of location or appearance, are similar.
  • The Boat Ride: Years ago, a Mississippi family braved a month of rain, culminating in a risky boat ride on a flooded river, exemplifying courage and faith in adversity.
  • Friday Night Church Service: My great-grandmother advocated for Friday night church services for youth, fearing their absence would lead to declining church attendance, which has occurred.
  • Unlocked Church: The story of a church, that had been left unlocked since 1940, when the new preacher installed locks on the doors.
  • The Seashell: This is the story of a family heirloom.
  • Snakes: This is a story told by my mom. She was scared of snakes. This story is about her having to deal with snakes as a young girl.
  • Just Vaccinate Me: This is a story about my grandfather and how he dealt with poison ivy. This has impacted our family for generations.
  • Child-like Faith: The story illustrates child-like faith through a mother’s experience during Hurricane Camille, emphasizing trust in God despite life’s challenges.
  • Coke Truck: On a hot summer day in the 1950s, Berry walks two miles for cokes, gets a ride home, and surprises his family.
  • Understanding Relationships Through a Child’s Eyes: After my parents’ divorce, my dad’s relationships and my accidental name mistake with his girlfriend led to unexpected lessons about faith and choices.
  • Listening to the Holy Spirit: A Life-Defining Moment- On August 13, 1999, a strong intuition led me not to wear my seat belt, saving my life during a severe car accident that injured me significantly.
  • Bloopers From Church: Laughter in Faith
  • Remembering My Grandmothers: A Hanukkah Reflection: The author reflects on memories of her grandmothers during Hanukkah, exploring family traditions, heritage, and the significance of a unique light shared across generations.

Listening to the Holy Spirit: A Life-Defining Moment

I will always remember Aug 13 1999. My mom and I were leaving Walmart on 16th Ave. As we were getting into the vehicle, I felt/heard a voice/ a nudging not to put my seat belt on. I always wore my seat belt, but this feeling was too strong. So, I delayed putting on my seat belt. As we were turning from 16th Ave to head for home a car ran the red light. This car was going too fast for that road and it did not have on its headlights. This was around 8:30 at night. The driver admitted to going 120 miles per hour.

We were in a very large old church van. The car hit the front of the van on my side. I sit in the front passenger seat. It then swung around and hit my side. This impact broke the motor support. The motor came through the dashboard and was sitting in my floorboard. Because I didn’t have my seat belt on, I was flung to the middle of the van. Only my right leg was caught between the motor and the door. It took the EMS 2 hours to get me out of the van. They had to use the jaws of life. My right eye was swollen shut. I had numerous cuts and scrapes. My right femur bone was broken. Thank God I listened to the nudging of the Holy Spirit. If I would have had my seat belt on, I would have stayed in my seat. Because of where the motor was, it would have either crushed both of my legs or killed me. Today, I am alive, and I can walk because of obedience to the prompting of the Holy Spirit. Always heed the prompting of the Holy Spirit. Stay in prayer where you know the voice of the Good Shepherd. My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. John 10:27-28.

Mastering Pancakes: A Generational Recipe

Pancakes!
My daddy was raised by his grandmother. He became grandma’s baby. He was frequently by her side. She made sure that nobody messed with her baby. Growing up he often watched her cook. He liked to eat pancakes, and she would make them for him. He learned to make pancakes by watching her make them.

When I was a little girl, he would sometimes make pancakes. It was always a treat. I would sit on the bar and watch him mix up the batter and fry them. After I got grown, I asked him, for the recipe. He explained that there was no written recipe. He had learned by watching his grandma.
This according to my dad is also a cake recipe when the batter is doubled. So, I watched him very closely as he poured in the flour and the sugar. I watched as he melted, the butter in the cast iron skillet. I watched as he mixed an egg into the flour and sugar. I watched as he added the water (he used water instead of milk because I was lactose intolerant), and mixed. Then he carefully added in the melted butter. According to him the butter, is the secret to fluffy pancakes. He made sure everything was mixed together and then he fried the pancakes in butter.
The next morning, he told me to make the pancakes while he watched to make sure I was doing it right.
I wrote the recipe down based on the proportions that were used. Below is the recipe.

Ingredients:

  • 1 1/2 cups Self-rising flour
  • 1/2 cup Sugar
  • 1 egg
  • 2 Tablespoons butter – Plus more for frying
  • ½-3/4 cup water or milk

Directions:

  1. Mix the flour and sugar together.
  2. Melt the butter.
  3. Mix the egg into the flour and sugar.
  4. Add 1/2 cup water
  5. Add butter.
  6. Add more water if needed to get the right consistency.
  7. Preheat the pan to medium heat.
  8. After the pan is hot, pour some of the batter into the pan and cook on low to medium heat until you see bubbles.
  9. Flip and cook until both sides are light brown.
  10. Finish cooking the rest of the batter the same way. Make sure to watch the pan. If the pan gets too hot, the pancake will cook too fast on the outside and not get done in the middle. If the pan gets too cool, the pancake will soak up too much butter and be greasy.
  11. Enjoy

God Hears Every Prayer: A Lesson from Childhood

There was a summer when the snake population was just too much. We were finding rattle snakes and water moccasins even by the house. I was only about 6 years old. My mom went to church and requested prayer for the snakes to stay away. At that time and place the pastor would take prayer requests from the pulpit. My mom waited her turn and explained the problem while asking for prayer. The congregation erupted into laughter. No one thought that God would answer such a prayer.

After church my mom explained to me that God hears our prayers and that it was our faith that mattered. It didn’t matter what the other people said or did. From that day we did not find any more snakes in our yard or on our land as long as we lived there.

To this day I still remember that God cared about even the seemingly simple cares that we had. No prayer is too small, too, silly, or too insignificant. The Bible says, ” Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” 1 Peter 5:7. This means that if it bothers you, causes you worry or concern, or affects you God is not too busy to hear about it from you. Remember all means all (everything).

Understanding Relationships Through a Child’s Eyes

My parents divorced when I was 4 years old. My mom got full custody of me and my dad had visitation rights. My dad was a long-haul truck driver. He was one of the best drivers. He won many safe driving awards. For a few years he was a long-haul driving instructor. That meant that the student and my dad lived in the same truck for the long trip. One of his students later became his girlfriend. Her name was Dolly. However, Dolly did not know that she was not the only girlfriend.

One of the other girlfriends (Tina) lived in Atlanta, GA. Uncle Hollis also lived in Atlanta, GA. So, when my dad and I went to see Uncle Hollis we stayed at Tina’s place. I told my dad that I did not like Tina. I told him this when it was just me and him in the car. He asked me why I didn’t like her. I explained that she was not understanding about my food allergies and that her children were mean to me. He explained that he didn’t like her either and that staying with her was cheaper than a motel room. He explained that after her usefulness was over, meaning Uncle Hollies was dead, that he was going to dump her. I am about 6 years old at this time. In the summer of 1991 Uncle Hollis dies. Sometime after the funeral my dad breaks it off with Tina.

The fall of 1991 my dad has decided to ask Dolly to marry him. He plans for me to go to my grandma’s house for Thanksgiving. He has Dolly meet him there. Before can ask Dolly to marry him Grandma puts my dad to work doing some chores for her. My grandma at this time is still running the Raymond Cleaners in Mississippi. So, Dolly is elected to keep me. I actually like Dolly. She was fun. She would play with me, take me out to eat, take me to the movies, and take me bowling.

This next part is difficult to explain. That day I made a big mistake. While Dolly was watching me, I called out the wrong name. I called her Tina. I have no idea why I called her that. Dolly asks me if I have an imaginary friend. I freeze up. I don’t know what to say. My dad gets very angry with me because I have ruined his plans. He tries hard to explain his actions, but to no avail.

Dolly stays in contact with me. Years later we talk about that day. She tells me how thankful was for my mistake. She explains that God was using me to keep her from making a big mistake. She also explains to me that around that same time, she had just started back to church. Over the years she kept going to church.

Easy 3-Ingredient Peanut Butter Cookies

When I was a little girl, we didn’t have much money. We certainly didn’t have money for extras like cookies, but children like cookies. I was no exception. Thankfully, we go WIC. WIC, for those that may not know, stands for Women, Infants, and Children. WIC gives food to poor women who have infants and young children. One of the food items every month was a very large can of peanut butter. My mom came up with a recipe for peanut butter cookies. It was so easy. It only needed 3 ingredients. I loved those cookies. I still use the recipe with my children today. My daughter really likes them because of how simple it is. 

Ingredients:

  • 1 Cup peanut butter
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1 egg

Directions:

  1. Mix all ingredients together.
  2. Roll into small balls and place onto an ungreased cookie sheet
  3. Press down with a fork
  4. Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit
  5. Bake for about 7 minutes
  6. Let cool before removing from cookie sheet